"Young, Wild, and Free.."

This week has been pretty intense.. It's almost over! Then we get a little break before next semester. I'm stoked for the weekend though, I get to relax and hang with this pretty awesome chick :) I don't have much free time nowadays, so the rare time I get to spend with friends is amazing! I was just talking with a friend about our female situations.. He's in a relationship with a girl he's not really invested in, because he doesn't want to throw himself out there and risk getting hurt. I just decided I'm gonna back off and let whatever happen. It's not worth my time to try for something if she's gonna back off mid way through. Relationships are like a drug. A healthy relationship can do wonders for a broken soul. I see this happen all the time. But a sour relationship or jumping from one to the next can often leave the person alone and in worse shape.

In other news.. tomorrow we find out our jobs for the next semester of ROTC. It's gonna be an interesting day, some of my friends are getting bumped up to all these cool positions, while others won't have a job at all. I'm probably gonna just be Honor Guard commander because I had an issue with our leadership this semester so my ranking plummeted. No worries, I just have to figure out how to go another year and a half without screwing up lol.


-T

"Just don't tell 'em I've gone crazy."

   Hey y'all. Do me a random favor and think about your exes for a bit. Look back to every crazy, jealous, militant, clingy, and overbearing ex;  think about what you learned from each experience. Hell, they don't even have to be an ex for you to learn that it wasn't gonna work. It pisses me off  when a great girl gets back with someone who treated her like shit, thinking "oh it won't happen again". Then she's got the audacity to complain. This works for guys too. Yeah, think about that crazy dancer or the cheerleader you dated in high school. Yep, the one that broke your nose. Why in the hell would you get back with that? Maybe you did, maybe you didn't. I just know that I got the hell out of there. The good thing is you learned lessons from each ex.

I can think of a few good lessons I learned with the past few ladies. (These go for guys and girls)

1. Make a damn move! If you think she's worth it, put in the effort.
2. People change. Every day. Make sure you're changing for the better.
3. If she ain't into you, just back out. You should never have to convince a girl you're dateable.
4. When you get out of a long relationship, don't jump right into the next one. Take some time to get reacquainted with yourself.

Bonus: If you don't love yourself, no one will.


Go ahead and write down one lesson you learned from an ex in the comment section below.

Take care,
-T

"...Every therapist has bad days."

I do everything possible to make sure my family and friends are happy... Then throw in ROTC and school taking up over 60 hours a week. Then add a job. Then I tried to add a girl.. that wasn't ready. That was dumb.. It's hard even attempting to date when you know your own history and not theirs. There's women from my past that know I'm an asshole. I know I'm an asshole. 

But when this pretty, bright eyed wonder meets you, you can't help but show her your very best.. You'll cancel events, skip class, be late to work, anything to make time for her. Then the stress piles up. Miss a few things and people start breathing down your neck as they watch you under a microscope, waiting for you to fuck up so they have a reason to kick you out. When you get stressed, you do something stupid. It could be as harsh as telling her you don't love her, or as simple as a drunk text reiterating something she's already heard. I wish I could apologize for my mistakes, but I don't even deserve the chance to explain myself.

On a non-related topic, the thought of death (not suicide) is just too comfortable right now. I'm not the type to go emo over a chick (especially when nothing even happened) so that's why I'm curious as to why I feel comfortable with the idea right now. I've learned many lessons this year, so I can pass some knowledge on to you. Take what you can from this.

This is YOUR life. If you live to make everyone else happy, you will hate yourself.

The last easy day was yesterday.

If she turned you down three times, get out of there. In a good way.

Friends want to help you as much as you want to help them. Give them that chance, you may be surprised.

You can't win a war on your own. Make good friends.

Do something extraordinary, every day.

If you don't trust 'em, toss 'em.
Stress isn't worth you wasting your time.

Be everyone's best friend.

Don't give up on the war just because you lost a battle.

Don't accept "good enough"

When in command, take command.
If you ain't having fun, you ain't doin' it right.

He who fails a thousand times is better than he who never tried.

This is YOUR life. Go do something amazing.

-T

Remember.. You're the shit. This is your life, all your gonna have at the end of the day is a little memory film strip. Do you want it to suck? Fuck no..make it JJ Abrams film filled with tits, explosions, crazy stories and moments of greatness. Fuck social rules. Fuck that little pussy voice in the back of your head that says no to you. Fuck letting awesome opportunities go by. This is your life, and the only person who decides what you get out of it is….YOU

-T

"Take a shot at something, don't think about it too much just take the shot."
"I don't even know where to aim.."
"Anywhere, everywhere, just take wild shots. Hell it's something just to hear the gun go off."  ---  Great movie.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! Today has definitely been a good day. Started off with some shooting in the desert with the guys in the morning (I'll put pics up soon!). Then I went to my second family's house for some AMAZING dinner! Now I'm relaxing at home with my dog, family, and some movies.

I'm proud to say that many people see me as an old soul. But with some things I'm just naive.. For the majority of my life, I have played it safe. I'm ready to take some risks, to do something different just for the experience. I'm ready to live.

-T

Sometime's you've just got to jump into the fire. Hell yeah, you're gonna get burned. But it's better than wondering "what ifs" for the rest of your life.

I can't really remember when I knew that I wanted to fly. It's just always been one of those dreams that I knew I needed to experience.. Maybe I'm still in that childish stage dreaming of being a hero. If so, I never want to grow up.

This semester has been rough.. but thanks to my amazing friends and supportive family I've been able to pull through. Now I just have to learn how to be perfect... one more screw up and I'm out of school and can kiss my flying dreams goodbye. That really pisses me off. But I haven't been calm enough to confront some people about it.

Lately, I've realized that I appear very stable to those around me and my words carry a lot of weight. It's amazing that people I have never met, know my name and are 100% confident in my abilities. I've worked incredibly hard to keep it that way. But what if they knew my faults? I can sum up how I'm feeling right now to this song. Thank you.

Stay strong,
-T

<--- Regarding my earlier post about stress, here's another way to deal with it. I think I'm damn good at this. Work was excruciatingly long today, this helped me out.

Side note; going to dinner with the family and mom's boyfriend tonight, first time I'm meeting the guy. We'll see how this goes.

-T

So for HG we have a large golden eagle for a mascot. I found this mini-eagle on my ride tonight!
In other news, every day since Veterans day has been busy. Last night was a ton of fun, we had a combat dining in for AFROTC and it's always a good time. Today was a good de-stress day as well. Tomorrow though, I go back to my university job. It's alright for a paycheck, but the girls I work with are awesome so they make the time fly by.

-T

Lesson of the month; Set aside some time to relax every now and then. 

Stress is a major cause for health problems. Take note of that while chasing your dreams. It's true that hard work brings big rewards. But, every now and then, just take a second to stop and breath. Let your mind wander for a while, enjoy your surroundings, dream. 

I always keep this quote in mind; 

"The journey is what brings us happiness, not the destination."

Take care my friends.

-T

"I'm not a good role model." That's not an excuse. You are a role model whether you like it or not. Trust me, there is someone out there who looks up to you and wants to be just like you. More than likely you are affecting more than one person. Sadly, some people out there don't realize this and they're only perpetuating the cycle of low-quality people. I don't know if I am anyone's role model, but at least I stay true to my values.
-T

Theme song for these past few months. ----->

-T

Life is good.
It seems like whenever I start to chase after a woman, life gets out of control crazy/busy/stressful. The second I decide I'm done chasing said woman, life gets easier to manage, and I got rid of this strep throat, that's been nagging me for weeks. But I'm doing me right now and that's working. One day I'll find the right gal, at the right time.
-T

This is the ending of an hour long argument I had with a woman from my university's financial aid office.

*In a very stern tone* "Sir, I don't think you understand the situation here. My hands are tied, I can't help you until you pay me."

"Ma'am I fully understand, but what I'm trying to get you to understand is that if I do not get this money, I have to enlist and therefore will not be able to pay you back for quite some time. So you can pay me today and get your loan back in a few months, and also get my tuition next year. Or you can continue to ignore me and forfeit over $20,000 for your company. It's your choice."

*Typing in the background*

"Sir, your loan for $4000 has been approved, have a great day." *click*

I've still got it!   :D
-T

Friday 5am; Wake up, shower, do work, get to the Det. Change into service dress, march in the parade.
          Noon; Pick up lunch, continue work from previous night, chill for 20 minutes. Drive out to the church.
          4pm; Performed our saber detail, head back home, finish work, sleep a few hours.

Saturday 5am; Wake up, shower, get to the Det. Change into service dress, go judge a high school drill meet.
              1pm; Leave drill meet, head out to NASCAR, do work in speed lane
              8pm; Head back into town, check out a friends new bike, got ditched, walk home, write up some emails, sleep a couple hours.

Today, 5am; Wake up; shower, change into civvies, go to NASCAR, break records, kick ass all day.
            7pm; Finally home,send out emails, done with the weekend. Post this Sleep like a beast (hopefully)

Yeah, this weekend has been ridiculous. NASCAR was fun as hell though, our whole job is to usher drunk race fans onto trams (similar to a bus) and make sure they don't get pissed and start a riot. Pretty fun stuff there. We broke a record though which kicked ass, we moved over 10,000 people down the tram line in under 58 minutes, which is a freakin' amazing feat when you're dealing with drunk people..
I learned a few lessons this weekend. Mainly, I'm awesome! Not to sound like a pretentious dick, but I had some self esteem issues ever since I was a kid and it's times like these when I'm reminded how awesome we all are. Sure, I got ditched by one girl, but I got hit on by several gorgeous women at the wedding, both nights of NASCAR, and on my walk home. And at NASCAR I took control because one of our guys couldn't get it done, then we break records. I always love those self esteem boosts :) Take care y'all!
-T

God bless our Veterans. I'm lucky to work with some of the most dedicated young men and women that are willing to serve in defense of our great nation. Yesterday I worked a flag raising detail at a local elementary school. It lifts my heart to see young kids stand tall and strong for our national anthem, and even taps. Plus they we're psyched when we gave them high fives..This morning I had the privilege to march in a veterans parade, it's amazing to see how many people will come out to support our military. And a few hours ago I had the honor to command a saber detail for a recently commissioned LT's wedding. Congrats LT!
-T

Time to man up.

-T

Can't quit now. Can't even take one step back. Not after how hard I've worked. To be thrown out for something as small as a communication error, or money, that's just not going to happen. Money has been a constant problem in my life.. I've been filthy rich, and dirt poor. There was a time when I lived in a mansion and drove a Corvette. There were times where I've stayed at friend's houses for weeks at a time because I couldn't pay the power bill. I'm going to try to rest for a bit.
-T

Anyone can give up. But to hold it together when everyone expects you to crumble, now that's strength.
-T

Competition.. I'm one hell of a competitive guy when it comes to sports, fighting, going after a job, etc. Competition over females always seemed like a sticky situation to me. If she's into you, back up a bit and let her weigh her options. But then again if the other guy still competes while you back off, it makes you look uninterested. So, naturally, the female heads to the guy that competed against no one. But, say you compete with this d-bag. You have a 50/50 shot (or less if there's more guys) of getting the girl or getting stuck in the friend zone, turning this into a big game of chance. Or if you're a highly competitive person like me you'll most likely take it too far and, bam; you lose the girl forever. Now that's a hell of a gamble.
-T

                   ^Awesome song.

I caught myself playing guitar out on the balcony a few days ago. It's been a while since I've played this much.. But that was a similar situation. I just hope that this one turns out positive. I find this time around to be more difficult. Past mistakes keep rushing around in my head and I end up too afraid to take that step forward. I can face an armed robber, but I'm afraid of this? I get the green light and I want to put the petal to the floor, but it's just out of reach. Actually.. That last sentence is wrong.. I don't have the fire to put the petal to the floor, if I had the ability, I would probably just take it out like a Sunday drive. That is where my problem lies, passion. I have passion for my job, I have passion for my country. But taking out a nice car for a drive.. why am I missing the passion there?
-T

If someone just gave you the keys to a sexy, fire red Ferrari, would you drive fast because it's a Ferrari, or slow because you don't want to wreck it?
-T

People that don't realize how awesome they are really piss me off.. You know who I'm talking about. The friend that dropped out of high school and still works at McDonald's, when you are coming up on your last year in college. Or the friend that still slides by in life on mommy and daddy's dime, at the age of 21. Or the friend letting potential just slip away by hanging with the wrong crowd. What pisses me off the most though, is when they are happy with their "amazing life" They don't see that a few years down the road they won't be able to take care of themselves, or god forbid, a child, on minimum wage. I am where I am because being "normal" was never good enough for me, and I never settle for less than the best. I just had to get that off my chest... /rant
-T